Life is as hard as I make it.
Thats what I've learned this year.
My last year in high school :(.
I wanna cry just thinking about it . Its a relief that I'm almost done but I abs love Crossroads.Its made me who i am , I'm never going to find the unique, exciting,different one of kind friends i've found there . I love my friends with all my heart and if it wasnt for them i wouldnt be where I am today. They truely have my heart,and even though I dont show it I love them with all my heart . I wish everyone of them the best lives that they deserve and that they will be happy and forfilled. They say this isn't goodbye but in reality I know it is. Its never going to be the same and i'll always long for that feeling to be close to them again . I love you guys :) The teachers have been amazing .... I'msofucking sad its rediculous I 'm in tears right now thank you guys for this wonderfull oppertunity i truly mean it and it hurts so bad to say goodbye.
Now all I have is John
Imean thatmanis my everything, but hes not Crossroads . Hes so closed minded and Crossroads I can get a differentt perspective on everything .
Even though I learn something new from him everyday and I know that I can grow as a person with him but honestly I think i would like to grow old by myself .I know that having someone to rub your back and be there for you is valuable thing to human nature but I just wanna be by myself .
Relationships are work and I wanna relax and focus on me
Allireally have is me and I want my vessal to be a model of perfection
and to be admired is my goal .
Some people are just meant to be alone and i've come to the conclusion i'm happy being alone
lets see how long this lasts i wish forever because a dick is only good til it comes thens like ugh now i actually have to talk to you,be there for you and take your shit
Actually this doesn't sound so bad with john but john is a whinner ,and he has alot of growing up to do.
who am I kidding I definatly don't want to be with John my whole life .
Fuck that shit but i love him no one is perfect but if I have to deal with you my whole life you better be close to it .
People are never happy but serioulsy how am isuppose to find what makes mehappy without working on myself first.
I'm making life harder than it is and if you want to be a intellectual you mustchallenge life to get to the deeper darker meaning of it .
So make life hard because in the end it will all be worth it .
you'll hold the key to life but have fun and live it to the fullest
Nothing but love (Diamond )
